September 4th, 2018

By: Pamela P. Siller, MD The Beginning As a practicing psychiatrist, I am frequently asked how to engage an unwilling patient in mental health treatment. My response is unvaried, “It is very difficult. The desire to change must come from within.” Although the precipitant to change can take many forms, it usually involves some degree of psychic pain or discomfort, as change is neither easy nor comfortable. The next step involves a will …
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September 4th, 2018

By Sara Teichman, Psy.D. Many parents see changing some part of their children’s behavior as a critical goal. They feel that it is their duty to fix their children, to eradicate any negative patterns of behavior. Some try to teach, lecture, give examples, and tell stories all in an effort to get their children to change. However their children already know the rules. They know that they should wait their turn, follow directions, etc. They d …
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September 4th, 2018

By Lisa Twerski, LCSW When we are children, our parents can imbue us with a healthy sense of self. They love us and we feel loved, they show confidence in us and we feel self-confident, they esteem us and we feel self-esteem. They may do this by expressing these things directly. They may do this by giving us the opportunity to try and succeed or fail, showing us that we have them by our side no matter what. There are many ways parents can seek to …
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May 31st, 2018

By Sara Teichman, Psy.D. Are your children basically good kids who happen to drive you crazy when they want something? Or, perhaps they are better with your husband and, wouldn’t you know it, angels in school. Let me guess. This is what it sounds like….. Your five-year-old whines and nags until he gets it [Shabbos cereal, a new toy, whatever]. Lots of kids do that, but this is over the top. He can go on all day! And even in public pl …
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May 31st, 2018

 By Pamela Siller MD What is healing? The healing process is individual and varies from person to person. A young child anxiously awaits a Band-Aid for a boo-boo, which magically cures all ails. A school-age child impatiently waits for an invitation to join the “in-crowd,” which is thought to banish loneliness. A physically ill woman hopes for a clear CT scan and a clean bill of health.  In healthcare, we speak of response, …
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May 31st, 2018

By David H. Rosmarin & Talia Kaplan “Let bygones be bygones” is a fairly common phrase amongst adults. Indeed, it’s a sign of maturity to deal with the stresses of daily life without becoming overly limited or restricted by our past. In many instances, this is a useful approach for example, when arguing with a spouse it is typically helpful to only focus on the issue at hand instead of rehashing old arguments and missteps. S …
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May 31st, 2018

By Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW-R There are a lot of parenting books out there. You would think that any parenting issue could be solved by simply following the well charted path as laid out by the professionals in the field. You will have a great relationship with your kid. Homework? Piece of cake. Bedtime? What could be more fun?               Yet, the reality is that raising children is an …
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May 31st, 2018

By Leah Rokeach LCSW "You are no good. You are a failure. You won't achieve anything good in your life. You might as well be dead." These are the voices that Jay, who is 38 years old, has been hearing since he was 22 years old. Jay lives at home with his single mom. He started to hear voices after he was let go from his job as a messenger   When he started to hear voices, he became very frightened and did not tell anyone. He isolated himself …
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May 31st, 2018

By Rabbi Dr. Yehuda Krohn, Psy. D Let’s try a brief experiment. I’m going to share a word or two with you.  As you read the word, I want you to pay attention to any emotions that may arise within you. Then, I want you to rate your experience on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 representing almost no emotion and 10 signaling emotions that are so intense they’re “off the charts.” Ready?   Here’s the first wor …
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May 31st, 2018

By Marlene Greenspan Healing involves a wide variety of techniques that enable the damaged or injured body to return to its original level of good health and functionality. Traditional medicine includes plants as well as synthetic applications and new technological releases from current research and development. Spiritual healing techniques today include mind and body connections that have been studied scientifically by modern therapists. Many of …
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May 31st, 2018

 By Dvora Entin, LCSW  Several years ago, I had the privilege of accompanying a couple on a very painful path of medical care and difficult choices for their newly delivered child. This family had reached out to rabbonim months before the due date to plan a halachicly guided course of decision making and spent many hours devoted to preparatory palliative care and planning for the many outcomes both expected and unexpected. When that bab …
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February 26th, 2018

Introduction February 2018 By Lisa Twerski, LCSW What needs to be disclosed? For many of us, this question conjures up thoughts of shidduchim and mental health. Dr. Pamela Siller tackles many of these issues, both from the perspective of the law, the considerations of the clinician and the worries of the person in shidduchim and his or her family. Elizabeth Carmen talks about one of the kinds of disclosures we may be asked to make for shidduch pu …
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February 26th, 2018

Why Children Misbehave By Sara Teichman, Psy. D. Do you find yourself embarrassed sometimes by your children’s behavior? Have you managed, by dint of consequences and threats, to teach them what not to do, but find they do not know what to do or how to do it? Do they have the knowledge and the skills they need in order to behave appropriately? We all know that children do well if they can. What child does not want to wake up to the love and …
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February 26th, 2018

Disclosure, How and When? By: Pamela P. Siller, MD “Hello doctor, this is Mrs. Goldman. I just wanted to let you know that Shmuel Rosen, his mother, or the Shadchen will be calling about Rivky. Such a wonderful boy, truly Bashert, but he has some questions for you. Just let them know my Rivky is fine, and all should be good, Kol Tuv”. Voicemails such as these, or any variations thereof, may instill fear, or at the very least, some de …
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February 26th, 2018

What Truly Counts in a Mate? Michael J Salamon, Ph.D. I have heard many accounts of just what people are looking for in a spouse. These stories range from questions of tablecloth colors; to a potential bride’s mother’s, and even grandmother’s, dress size; to the age at which the potential choson was toilet trained; to whether or not they chew gum; to how much money the partner’s parents are committing to the couple for the …
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February 26th, 2018

Acceptance and Communication: Cornerstones in Marriage By: David H. Rosmarin, Ph.D   Imagine the following scenario: You and your husband are recently married. You move into a new community and are looking to become more acquainted with other people, so your husband joins the local shul and becomes involved with their evening programming. You are happy for him and don’t want to interfere, but as time passes you realize you really don&r …
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February 26th, 2018

The Pressure Is On: The Impact of Stress On Our Children and What We Can Do About It. By Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW-R   In today’s fast paced modern world, the experience of life is assaulted upon by a relentless barrage of stress and pressure. Mommy is rushing to get everyone out of the house.  Mommy and daddy are getting ready for work and I am hurriedly escorted out of my home onto the school bus. I arrive at school and spend …
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February 26th, 2018

Changing the Rules Dvora Entin, LCSW in collaboration with Zisa Levin, RMSWI Just when you think you finally know the way to talk about sexual abuse prevention, the rules change. Take a look at prevention curriculums, where we teach about "Ok Touch" and "Not OK Touch" and the caveat we put in that "even though you don't like how it feels, it's ok for a doctor to touch your private parts because he or she is there to keep you healthy."  Oh, a …
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February 26th, 2018

When Asking for a Woman’s Dress Size Becomes the Norm: How Dating in the Jewish World is Contributing to Body Image Issues and Disordered Eating By: Elizabeth Carmen, MA, Ed.M, LMHC The media, both Jewish and secular, has been giving this topic a lot of attention lately, which is terriï¬�c, but also highlights the fact that there is a major pandemic in the community. While writing this article, an article was published in Self magazine abou …
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November 28th, 2017

By Yehuda Krohn, PsyD A little over a month ago, many of us were present in shul when Megillas Kohelles was read. In perhaps the best known section of Kohelles, the beginning of the third chapter, we are introduced to the notion that there is a time and season for every object under the heavens. What is remarkable about what follows – a time to give birth, a time to die; a time to plant, a time to uproot; and each of the subsequent pairings …
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November 28th, 2017

By Sara Teichman, Psy.D. Do you feel like you can’t tell your kids anything? Even something like “remember your lunch money” or “Did you shut the air in your room?” Forget about something that is actually instructive – mind you, not critical. So, does a reminder that there is a family Bar Mitzvah the night before finals or a suggestion to take winter clothes to the school Shabbaton elicit a barrage of eye rolli …
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November 28th, 2017

By Michael J. Salamon, Ph.D. A recent report from ABC News Australia validates what those of us in the field already know, “Poorly trained relationship counsellors (are) doing more harm than good.” According to the Australian College of Relationship Counsellors, couples experiencing marital difficulties are turning to therapists who are not well prepared but are less expensive. This is due to the fact that, in Australia, less prepared …
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November 28th, 2017

By Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW   *Names and circumstances have been altered to protect client privacy   He’s out of control. David is constantly fighting with kids in his class and taking things from them, often unprovoked. He has been this way since he entered preschool a year ago. He is defiant at school and aggressive at home.        Leah has a difficult time focusing and following instructions. She often appear …
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November 28th, 2017

 By Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D. Author’s note: The privacy and confidentiality of individuals found in this narrative was safeguarded, by modifying identifying details.      Our session began, as scheduled, the Sunday after Simchas Torah. I waited for Moe to choose a starting point.  He opened with “Well, Yom Tov was fine.  It was really draining, though.”  I thought I knew what Moe meant:  There …
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November 28th, 2017

By Esther Goldstein LCSW   How can you provide a framework for your children to develop into confident, solid individuals who can build meaningful lives? Let's take a look at the trajectory of a life. Children come into this world seeking safety, love, connection, and responsiveness. What matters beneath it all is that child know they are seen, heard, responded to, and reassured with safety. This way they can begin to trust that they are saf …
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November 28th, 2017

By Regine Galanti, Ph.D. A parent was recently in my office to discuss her young daughter’s defiant behavior. She described noticing that, in her relationship with her children, she’s constantly busy with them, but rarely gives them her full attention, especially if they’re not misbehaving. As a parent, I can relate. My children take up almost all of my time, cooking their dinners, supervising homework, shepherding them between …
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November 28th, 2017

By Dvora Entin, LCSW Let’s share a cup of tea: the emotional experience of grieving a pregnancy loss   Bereavement doesn't really come with an instruction manual.  Mourning does. As Torah guided people, we get the directions about burial, shiva, tearing clothes, where to sit, and what to cover, but the experience of what comes next is a bit absent for the grieving. Especially for those that have a less defined, focused period for …
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Author: Lisa Twerski, LCSW

August 28th, 2017

When it comes to childrearing, there are so many decisions to be made. One major area is schooling and all the decisions that go into making sure our children have the healthiest experience they can have in the place they spend the majority of their day. One of the reasons this can become anxiety- provoking is the fact that each child is different, and can require so many different things, depending on so many factors. More than one child can mea …
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Author: Alan Winder, PhD

August 28th, 2017

Wouldn’t it would be great if divorce didn’t exist, people were always happy in their marriage, and they stayed together for the rest of their lives? There was a time when people tended–for better or worse–to stay married, and divorce was not commonplace. Unfortunately today, as we are all aware, divorce rates have been quite high, and only continue to rise. When a couple separates and/or decides to divorce, there are cert …
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Author: Alan M. Singer, Ph.D., LMSW

August 28th, 2017

 When one thinks of marital problems, two primary issues generally come to mind: compatibility and communication. Contrary to popular belief, compatibility is not something you have–it is something you create. It is about how you speak to each other, how well you get along, and how you move through time together. Rarely do couples call me for a counseling appointment and mention a lack of compatibility as their primary issue, even thou …
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Author: Marlene Greenspan, MA, LPC

August 28th, 2017

  Today’s world is jam-packed with information via a constant and steady barrage on our technological devices that surround and accompany us everywhere we go. Our children, as well, are in the same predicament. PBS Kids, for example, offers an endless stream of programs designed to entertain and educate children practically from infancy. Using color and movement, these programs fascinate young viewers, regardless of whether or not they …
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Author: Sara Teichman, Psy.D.

August 28th, 2017

All too many parents struggle with discipline. They will often complain that they have trouble making their rules stick, and busy themselves with searching for the “magic” that will make the process of discipline work. They may search for a list of punishments that they can whip out at a moment’s notice in the hope that that would get the children to listen. Unfortunately, despite ads and claims to the contrary, there is no magi …
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Author: Pamela P. Siller, MD

August 28th, 2017

We have all experienced trepidation before a life-changing event, or a small anxiety-provoking experience. The feelings of butterflies in your stomach, your heart pounding in your chest, or the need to run to the bathroom several times in an hour, is a familiar sensation to most everybody. Regardless of whether you are worried about an upcoming flight, an important business meeting or a life-altering phone call, the physical sensation is the same …
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Author: Dvora Entin, LCSW

August 28th, 2017

In a world where news headlines change dramatically at lightning speed almost hourly, perhaps the Netflix series, 13 Reasons Why, seems like an already irrelevant topic of conversation or discussion. As a therapist who had to watch most of the episodes for a work-related responsibility, the content of the show persists in my subconscious and continues to draw my attention even several months later. Seeing this series as a parent of teenagers, as …
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Author: Michael J. Salamon, Ph.D., FICCP

August 28th, 2017

I recently saw a 12-year-old boy drinking bourbon at a party. He was making faces as he absorbed the burn of the liquid. I asked him who gave him the drink. “A friend,” he replied. “Do you like it?” I asked. “It’s uchy.” “So why drink it?” “I drink it so I can be part of their group,” was his honest, and very naïve, response. I followed him around for a few minutes and saw tha …
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Author: Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW

August 28th, 2017

What is that deep feeling of relief washing over parents across the globe? Oh yes, school is almost here!  As happy as parents were for the much needed break of summer, parents are just as happy at this point to wave goodbye as their children cruise down the road in the big yellow school bus.  You are looking forward–but maybe your child is not. As the first day of school approaches, maybe you notice subtle differences in your chi …
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Author: Rabbi Dr. Joel Rosenshein, Ph.D.

August 28th, 2017

In today's day and age, there seems to be a popular belief that children should not be raised in the old method of reward or punishment. When we look around, however, it is apparent that many of our present problems with our children come down to our spoiling them, perhaps more so than in any previous generation. Although there is a need to praise more than to discipline, to reward more than to discipline, it is still essential to provide consequ …
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June 29th, 2017

By Lisa Twerski Embracing Mental Illness. The words alone must create some confusion and much head-scratching. After all, why would we want to embrace mental illness? Aren’t we trying to cure it? Isn’t mental illness something that nobody wants to experience, and nobody wants to embrace? The short answer is yes, we do try to cure it, but the realistic answer is that it is not always possible, and the long answer is that even when it i …
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June 29th, 2017

By Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW Once again, another school year has come to a close. For some kids, the year was enjoyable and rewarding; for others, not so much. Struggle, frustration, disappointment, behavioral issues and failure were hallmarks of their experience. For these kids and their parents, the respite of summer vacation couldn’t come any sooner. Parents can become particularly frustrated when they know and believe that their child is …
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June 29th, 2017

By Pamela P. Siller, MD There is a common misconception that if a child attends a yeshiva, he is not eligible to receive services from the Department of Education (DOE) within the five boroughs of New York City. As a psychiatrist who provides services for the DOE, I have been able to provide assessments in yeshivas, as well as in public schools. Consider the following scenario: Jacob is a nine-year-old boy who attends a yeshiva in Queens. Althoug …
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