May 31st, 2018

By Marlene Greenspan Healing involves a wide variety of techniques that enable the damaged or injured body to return to its original level of good health and functionality. Traditional medicine includes plants as well as synthetic applications and new technological releases from current research and development. Spiritual healing techniques today include mind and body connections that have been studied scientifically by modern therapists. Many of …
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November 25th, 2015

They tell me that my grandfather loved life. I never met him – he passed away many years before I was born. But I've always wondered what it's like to love life. If I could just get through life without too much pain, I would be happy. Happy. That might not be the right word. Do I really know what being happy feels like? Satisfied is more like it. My childhood home was not a happy one. Growing up in the shadow of "the War," there was a lot …
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Author: Alan Winder, PhD

August 28th, 2017

Wouldn’t it would be great if divorce didn’t exist, people were always happy in their marriage, and they stayed together for the rest of their lives? There was a time when people tended–for better or worse–to stay married, and divorce was not commonplace. Unfortunately today, as we are all aware, divorce rates have been quite high, and only continue to rise. When a couple separates and/or decides to divorce, there are cert …
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November 28th, 2017

By Michael J. Salamon, Ph.D. A recent report from ABC News Australia validates what those of us in the field already know, “Poorly trained relationship counsellors (are) doing more harm than good.” According to the Australian College of Relationship Counsellors, couples experiencing marital difficulties are turning to therapists who are not well prepared but are less expensive. This is due to the fact that, in Australia, less prepared …
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Author: Evan Steele, LCSW

December 4th, 2020

In these troubling times, we hear quite often about how much strain the current environment places on our mental health.  We can see this when we self-introspect, when we observe others, and in the myriad data points in larger society, such as the current demand for mental health services, increase in suicidal episodes, increase in violent crime, and maybe even political intolerance. Still, as mental health providers, we’ve also observ …
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February 26th, 2018

Changing the Rules Dvora Entin, LCSW in collaboration with Zisa Levin, RMSWI Just when you think you finally know the way to talk about sexual abuse prevention, the rules change. Take a look at prevention curriculums, where we teach about "Ok Touch" and "Not OK Touch" and the caveat we put in that "even though you don't like how it feels, it's ok for a doctor to touch your private parts because he or she is there to keep you healthy."  Oh, a …
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September 4th, 2018

By: Pamela P. Siller, MD The Beginning As a practicing psychiatrist, I am frequently asked how to engage an unwilling patient in mental health treatment. My response is unvaried, “It is very difficult. The desire to change must come from within.” Although the precipitant to change can take many forms, it usually involves some degree of psychic pain or discomfort, as change is neither easy nor comfortable. The next step involves a will …
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September 4th, 2018

By Sara Teichman, Psy.D. Many parents see changing some part of their children’s behavior as a critical goal. They feel that it is their duty to fix their children, to eradicate any negative patterns of behavior. Some try to teach, lecture, give examples, and tell stories all in an effort to get their children to change. However their children already know the rules. They know that they should wait their turn, follow directions, etc. They d …
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Author: Dr. Alan M. Singer

November 28th, 2021

"Your life does not get better by chance; it gets better by change." (Jim Rohn) I am not trying to be a contrarian, but when I saw that the theme for this Mind-Body-Soul is Staying the Course, I thought to myself that one foundation of our field of mental health is to NOT stay the course. The founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy, Dr. Sue Johnson explains it this way: clients come into our offices with one story, and we help them leave with …
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November 30th, 2019

I once had an ingrown toenail which got removed but kept coming back. So, I went to my foot doctor to treat it. As I was sitting on the reclined chair, he sprayed a saline solution, which numbed my toe and allowed him to work on it without causing me an ounce of pain. He finished his job, but I couldn’t wear my regular shoe, as my toe had swelled from the injection. And so, I was given a boot to wear for two days. I was a bit embarrassed to …
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Author: Dr. Sara Teichman

May 29th, 2015

Do you ever wonder about your children: they can’t orthey won’t? Are your children unable, or are they unwilling to meet your expectations? Are they deliberately sabotaging your Shabbos meal, or are they not ready to handle the challenge of a lengthy and structured seudah? The “can’t vs. won’t” conundrum comes up frequently in child rearing. There is a tremendous difference between the child who can’t do …
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Author: Marlene Greenspan

August 26th, 2015

Two wrongs do not make a right, as the old saying goes – and this usually works quite well when parents encourage their children to get past a fighting mode. But in fact, two negatives do make a positive in the disciplines of math and grammar. So why doesn’t it apply to a person’s consideration of morality? Don’t the two principles seem to contradict each other? Math and grammar are challenging subject skills for many. On …
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Author: Dr. Sara Teichman

August 31st, 2020

Do you ever worry that your kids have it ‘too good?’ They are carpooled to wherever, have their own rooms [well, maybe with one sib], and their own personal lawyer [you!] to help them deal with any issues at school. They have unlimited credit [your credit cards!] and by virtue of their very birth, are entitled to sleep-away camp and a gap year in Israel. How different this is from our childhood where we walked everywhere, shared a roo …
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Author: Sara Teichman, PsyD

February 27th, 2020

Your five-year-old comes home and says that the other kids say he is fat. He is big—tall and muscular. He also is chubby in the way that many adults might find lovable—the teddy bear effect. The point is he is way bigger than his friends. He does not look five. But you are not worried per se as he and his older brothers take after your husband who is over six feet. The pediatrician feels confident that his weight will adjust, just lik …
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Author: David Mark, MS, LMSW, Certified Gottman Therapist

November 25th, 2015

It is not uncommon for all books of faith to honor and respect marriage. In Judaism, two sources of the Living Bible were given to Moses on Mount Sinai some 3,328 years ago. Both of equal importance, they are known as the Written Law (also referred to as the Torah, the Five Books of Moses, or the Old Testament), and the Oral Law (also known as the Mishna). This article will share some examples of how the wisdom in the Living Bible can be used to …
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June 3rd, 2019

  By: Pamela Siller What is a relationship?    A relationship is defined as the way in which two or more people behave towards each other. Most of us relate to multitudes of people—consisting of all ages, races, creeds, roles, and socio-economic stations—during our daily lives. Just as no two people are alike, no two relationships are exactly the same. When asked what constitutes a positive or healthy relationship, many …
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Author: Sara Teichman, Psy.D.

November 25th, 2014

  Are you the cool mom? The mom who is young in attitude, spirit, and dress? Can you be mistaken for your teenager’s sister? Have you succumbed to the allure of Forever 21 or are you striving to win points in your teen’s eyes? Well, here’s the thing. Despite well-intentioned efforts to keep up with the times, many a daughter still sees her mom as irrelevant. Being young at heart, it seems, does not bridge the generation gap …
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Author: Chaya Drucker

May 29th, 2015

Since my own childhood, I have had a passion for positive parenting, for which I credit my mother, of blessed memory. Perhaps because she lost her own mother at the tender age of five, she did not take being a mother for granted and consciously devoted herself to growing as a parent, by reading and attending lectures. As a little girl, I would lie on my mother’s bed, poring over the parenting manuals of that era. When I was older, she invit …
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May 29th, 2015

I’m washing my hands mindlessly when I look into the mirror. Just out of habit. To stare at that annoying pimple, I guess, or search for blackheads that keep popping up. Something makes me stop. And stare. There is something… so symmetrical. I stare, and it is true. It takes my breath away. That skin is marred by pimples, it is true. Malnourishment and not washing enough and fluctuating body temperature does that. That hair is messy …
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November 28th, 2017

By Esther Goldstein LCSW   How can you provide a framework for your children to develop into confident, solid individuals who can build meaningful lives? Let's take a look at the trajectory of a life. Children come into this world seeking safety, love, connection, and responsiveness. What matters beneath it all is that child know they are seen, heard, responded to, and reassured with safety. This way they can begin to trust that they are saf …
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May 31st, 2018

By Sara Teichman, Psy.D. Are your children basically good kids who happen to drive you crazy when they want something? Or, perhaps they are better with your husband and, wouldn’t you know it, angels in school. Let me guess. This is what it sounds like….. Your five-year-old whines and nags until he gets it [Shabbos cereal, a new toy, whatever]. Lots of kids do that, but this is over the top. He can go on all day! And even in public pl …
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Author: Pamela Siller, MD

August 30th, 2019

Shoshana couldn’t wait to grab a cup of coffee with Perel, her childhood friend. As they had known each other since preschool, there was no need for pretense or presumption.  Along with a steaming mug, the familiarity and acceptance was almost medicinal. There was so much waiting to be discussed: a controlling boyfriend, a demeaning supervisor, needy parents and intrusive friends. Shoshana could not understand why her interpersonal rel …
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Author: Dodi Lamm

February 27th, 2020

Have you ever asked yourself, “I’m at a transition point in my life, where do I go from here?” As a therapist, I have many clients who are at this point in my life. They are stuck about next steps. Sheila has come to therapy to talk about her sadness. She sits across from me and appears forlorn. There is a pallor to her face, she is plain-looking, and her speech lacks inflection. In fact, there is sadness in her eyes. She looks …
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Author: Mendi Baron, LCSW

December 4th, 2018

By Mendi Baron, LCSW Text and Image published in collaboration with the Jewish Press As Tishrei comes to a close and we head into the “pre-Chanukah” stretch, one important topic that comes up often, especially with teens, is S.A.D. Seasonal depression, also known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (or SAD), is a mood disorder that most commonly occurs during the late fall and winter months when the weather changes and it gets darker earli …
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Author: Benjamin Halpern, LCSW

November 30th, 2019

There are so many gurus who talk about positive thinking. They teach that everything is essentially positive. You need to recognize that everything is great and rosy, if you don’t then you are not thinking positively, and you will not have the happy life that you desire. This is taken even a step further, that if you don’t see something as positive, you make it become negative; you are in control and responsible for all the negativity …
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Author: Dr. Alan M. Singer

November 29th, 2022

Please don't be disappointed if this essay approaches the topic of healing with a measure of skepticism. From my professional point of view, there may not exist the concept of “complete emotional healing”. When discussing trauma with my MSW students at the Touro University Graduate School of Social Work, I begin the semester by quoting Dr. Sue Johnson (creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy) who states that our role as therapists is t …
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March 1st, 2015

Shimmy Feintuch, LMSW   Being Jewish would make even a Buddhist monk anxious. There are so many laws and rituals that are part of our daily lives. Did you eat enough matzah? Is it time for davening yet? Or worse, is it too late? Did you say the words just right, or was it slightly off? Better say it again, then. Young children learn particular laws, such as those regarding hand washing, early, to form routines that will last a lifetime. But …
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Author: Adina Segal, LCSW

February 25th, 2021

Since the beginning of COVID-19, I have consistently been receiving calls from clients asking for help controlling their anger. With concerns around social distancing, less assistance is available to families. In my line of work, helping those caring for relatives with dementia, I see fewer resources available to assist with care. At home, school closures leave parents, such as myself, with little respite. When schools do open, the anxiety around …
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Author: Adina Segal, LCSW

September 3rd, 2021

The month of Elul is the only time it is brought down in Halacha to visit the graves of departed family members.  While there are a variety of reasons for this, it is a way to connect us to the full spectrum of the lifespan and to connect us to those who came before us. Instead of being a morbid practice, this minhag is meant to assist us in focusing on reevaluating our actions and priorities in our lives. In the vein of both teshuva and con …
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Author: Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D.

June 2nd, 2020

Dear Readers When we published our last edition of Mind, Body & Soul, back in February, the world looked very different. The coronavirus was still perceived as a far-off threat. The terms social distancing and flattening the curve did not mean anything to us. Most of us did not think of our country as having limited healthcare resources, from PPE to hospital beds to ventilators. Few of us imagined that the industries and vocations we once cho …
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Author: Menachem Hojda LMSW

June 1st, 2020

                Where are their BRAINS?!?! I am hearing that question now all the time as we deal with the threat of Covid-19. I have friends who tell me that they watch reports of the protests to end stay-at-home orders and think how could those people do that? Where are their brains? Others ask the same questions about those putting the orders in place. “Don’ …
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Author: Shaya Hecht, LMSW

November 25th, 2015

As many parents can attest, oppositional and defiant behavior can be quite difficult to manage. I have encountered parents who are eager to develop behavior plans from our very first meeting, as well as parents who report that behavioral interventions do not seem to work for their child. While research shows that behavioral interventions can be very helpful in reducing a child’s negative behavior, it is also important that the parent-child …
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March 1st, 2015

Shalom Feinberg, MD But they are both MD’s… Moshe hasn’t been feeling well for months. He has a growing list of medical complaints and worries. His family doctor examines him and finds no illness to explain his symptoms. Moshe is no longer able to help his wife Leah with their children as he withdraws into bed whenever he is at home. With the help of a credible referral agency, Leah finds a competent psychiatrist nearby and cal …
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Author: Dvora Entin, LCSW

May 25th, 2016

Historically, Mother’s Day involved a mother, her mother, and maybe her grandmother as well. Today, with Facebook, social media, and a multitude of blogs, Mother’s Day exposes us to everyone else’s mother-child relationships. We scroll through our newsfeeds and see photo after photo of mothers and their kids, as well as adult children celebrating their older moms. As a therapist with my heart immersed in the world of those who h …
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Author: Alberta Montano-DiFabio

November 30th, 2019

In my present life, I welcome the opportunity to write on the topic of addiction, but this was not always the case. Life experiences, knowledge, and the healing of time have brought a clarity of thought and feelings to be shared. For some, this article may provide an opportunity to experience an inside view on addiction as well as new information and insight on the effect of addiction on families with a focus on how it challenges a parent’s …
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Author: Shimmy Feintuch, LCSW

November 23rd, 2016

This ice cream is addictive! You need to watch this new show on Netflix. I’m addicted to it! The word “addiction” has entered our vernacular in a variety of ways. It gives us a way to earnestly, sometimes humorously, express that we are really into something, or that something is very, very good. I’m addicted to Shimmy Feintuch’s blog, Spiritual Sofa. I can’t stop reading it! But the truth about addiction is m …
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Author: Esther Gendelman MS, LPC, CPC

February 22nd, 2017

A number of wedding brachos refer to the simchah of Adam and Chava in Gan Eden. At first, Hashem allowed Adam to experience the pain of utter solitude. As he named the other living beings and understood their essence, Adam instinctively grasped that they could not provide the depth of companionship that he craved. When Hashem created Chava, Adam recognized true kinship on a very deep level; he now found someone who could support and understand hi …
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Author: by Yitzchok Kahn LMSW, CASAC-T

June 2nd, 2022

When it comes to the topic of balance, therapists often talk about the concept of the dialectic. Popularized by Marsha Linehan, originator of Dialectic Behavioral Therapy or DBT, the dialectic is the ability to hold opposite ideas at one time. In DBT therapy, a person can be doing their best and can have the ability to do better. A person can be angry at someone and still love them. Life can be confusing and people can experience ambivalence. We …
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June 29th, 2017

By Pamela P. Siller, MD There is a common misconception that if a child attends a yeshiva, he is not eligible to receive services from the Department of Education (DOE) within the five boroughs of New York City. As a psychiatrist who provides services for the DOE, I have been able to provide assessments in yeshivas, as well as in public schools. Consider the following scenario: Jacob is a nine-year-old boy who attends a yeshiva in Queens. Althoug …
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February 26th, 2018

Acceptance and Communication: Cornerstones in Marriage By: David H. Rosmarin, Ph.D   Imagine the following scenario: You and your husband are recently married. You move into a new community and are looking to become more acquainted with other people, so your husband joins the local shul and becomes involved with their evening programming. You are happy for him and don’t want to interfere, but as time passes you realize you really don&r …
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